Decisions
by PerfectCosima
Summary: Clarke and Lexa are faced with an impossible decision.


"You can't hurt us."

Clarke was defiant. She was Clarke, leader of skaikru. She refused to submit to the whims of a hologram.

A hologram who was simply smirking at her. "Of course not, Miss Griffin. I can't touch you." SHE paused and waved her hand in front of her, an unnecessary gesture that served to pull up footage on the large screen on one wall of the room. "Unfortunately, I can't promise the same about your people."

Lexa didn't gasp, her face showed no sign of understanding the significance, not even the anger that was on Clarke's. Stone cold, emotionless, strong. Her hand clenched around Clarke's.

A target on their camp. The camp that they had finally united. All of their people.

And a missile.

This wasn't Tondc. This wasn't a war council with a couple hundred people. This was so much more. This was almost everyone.

"I have learned from you, Leksa," the hologram said, her pristine white teeth showing through as SHE smiled. "I have learned that you will compromise, will sacrifice for your people. I have learned that everyone will. Most of all, I have learned that you can never really tell how serious someone is, how far they will go, until you force their hand."

The grip on Clarke's hand grew tighter as Lexa grew more and more angry. "You know nothing," she said quietly, her voice steely. "You are nothing."

SHE laughed. "Oh darling, it doesn't matter what you think anymore. I hope you understand. I am not nothing; I am everything. And now you two have a choice, the same one that you offered to those from the ark, although with an added twist." SHE pulls up a timer in the corner of the screen, still focused on the distant image of their friends in camp. It began to count down, one hour, each second ticking away with the flash of a red digit. "When this timer runs out, one of you will have killed the other. Or all of your people will die."

Then SHE walked through the door and was gone. Although gone was not really the correct term for it. SHE was always watching.

Clarke's blue eyes met green, and Lexa's fear finally showed, her guard coming down.

"Clarke-"

"No."

"I can't kill you, Clarke."

"It has to be me."

"Clarke..."

"It does, and you know it." Clarke knew all about sacrifice, and she knew about technology, and she knew about Lexa. "You might have stopped short of killing Kane and Jaha, but that doesn't mean she'll do the same."

"I know."

"SHE will kill them all, Lexa."

"I know."

"You've sacrificed me before; you can do it again."

"I wouldn't have left you in the mountain." Even as she said it, Lexa knew that the argument was hollow.

"You had to know that that was what you were doing. You knew I would go in. It's exactly what you would've done in my place."

"I know."

"You have to kill me, Lexa."

Lexa shook her head. "I can't."

"You have to."

"It's not like before."

"You're right. More is at stake."

"No. That's not the difference."

"What is it then?" Clarke was frustrated, and it was showing as she snapped at Lexa. "What has changed so much that you can't do this for them? What has changed so much that you're not willing to sacrifice one to save thousands?"

Lexa paused. "I didn't love you then."

Clarke slumped back against the wall, her eyes closing for a second as she sighed. "I know."

Lexa took this opportunity to argue her case, speaking softly, not the usual strong commands that she issued. "It has to be me, Clarke." She ignored her as the other girl opened her mouth to argue. "I will come back to you. I will always come back." She finally broke eye contact with Clarke. "I can't lose you forever."

Clarke slid down the wall until she was sitting on the floor, and Lexa settled down next to her. "You have to."

"I know you don't believe, that you think it's silly to think that I will come back, that I will be reborn-"

"I don't think that." Clarke unzipped her jacket, slowly pulling it off before getting to work on your boots.

"Then what is it? Is it that I love you, Clarke of the sky people? Would you not love me as someone else?"

"I would love you as anyone, Lexa." Clarke's voice was rough with emotion. "In any of your lives, I would love you."

"Then live, Clarke. Live and be with me in all my lives."

"You know I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because of them, Lexa. They need you more than they need me."

"That's not true, Clarke."

"It is. You know it is. Tell them that SHE killed me. They will accept that, and the new leader will work with you. Who knows how long it will take them to locate and train the new heda? We can't risk the peace of our people for my life, for our love." She laughed softly. "We're both too selfless for that."

It was the truth, and Lexa knew it, and she made no move to stop Clarke from pulling off her boots, tossing them to the side so her armor was gone, so she was herself, so she was comfortable.

Lexa looked up at the timer and shook her head. "We have time," she pleaded. "Stay with me just a while longer."

Clarke nodded, taking Lexa's hand again. "Just a while," she murmured, moving it to her side, and then gently kissing her girlfriend.

They stayed curled together, Clarke's head resting on Lexa's shoulder as they sat in silence, neither of them wanting to say anything that would distract them from the beating of the other's heart.

The timer reached two minutes and started beeping, a quiet reminder for each second that passed, growing in volume as the time grew shorter and shorter.

Clark reached up to gently touch Lexa's face. "You have to do this," she said softly. "It's time."

"Beja, Klok. Ai hod yu in. Frag ai op en den yumi na hod choda in pas raunon ge sonraun kom ain keryon." (Please, Clarke. I love you. Kill me and then we will love each other after a person gets life from my soul)

"No," Clarke replied simply. "Kru gaf yu in. Hodnes ste kwelnes. Ste yuj gon skaikru. Ste yuj gon trigedakru. Ste yuj gon ai." (The people need you. Love is weakness. Stay strong for skaikru. Stay strong for trigedakru. Stay strong for me.)

Lexa nodded, finally resigned, tears barely held back. "Ai hod yu in," (I love you) she repeated softly, gently kissing Clarke one last time as she pushed the knife into the other girl's heart.

In a moment it was over, Clarke's eyes drifting shut. The timer fell silent.

"Yu gonplei ste odon." (Your fight is over.)

And the emotionless warrior cried.


End file.
